8 things Russia wants from Ukraine war:
1. Stop Obama from overthrowing democracy in Russia.
2. The rare metal mines in eastern Ukraine.
3. Heavy industry – especially aircraft and military.
4. Farmland promised to China.
5. A buffer zone of people to die for mother Russia.
6. Humiliate Obama for Egypt, Libya, and Syria.
7. Punish Ukraine for scaring his puppet Yanukovych into running.
8. The money the EU stole.
Did I miss any of your favorite reasons?